Search found 164 matches

by WhyOhWhy
Tue Jan 21, 2020 9:02 pm
Forum: In-Laws Talk
Topic: Happy New Year
Replies: 4
Views: 78

Re: Happy New Year

It's always so uncomfortable in the moment to refuse things like pics with toxic family members. I mean, y'all did agree to stop in when he thought your FIL was standing there, and of course the subject of seeing the kids more was bound to come up. I guess from now on avoid going by there, and next ...
by WhyOhWhy
Sat Jan 18, 2020 3:12 pm
Forum: In-Laws Talk
Topic: Finally free
Replies: 5
Views: 152

Re: Finally free

There's a lot to unpack from reading this, which means of course it's SO much more to unpack for you who has lived it. There's a lot I want to say, but the thing that hit me first was that (I'm sure you must know this by now) it is probably a huge blessing that you did not have a child with your spo...
by WhyOhWhy
Mon Jan 13, 2020 4:43 pm
Forum: In-Laws Talk
Topic: Happy 2020! Trying to start my New Year right...advice?
Replies: 4
Views: 154

Re: Happy 2020! Trying to start my New Year right...advice?

I created a special list called NOPE and put anyone I didn't want to see such personal posts and pics on (if you click on "friends" under their name, there's an option to "add to another list". They stay your FB friend, but whenever you create a post that you don't want those particular people to se...
by WhyOhWhy
Mon Jan 06, 2020 12:29 am
Forum: In-Laws Talk
Topic: Another generation is born into the toxic ILs
Replies: 7
Views: 381

Re: Another generation is born into the toxic ILs

Steer clear of the $#!t show and hope for the best. That poor baby will likely be traumatized by that mess of a family! Poor little thing!
by WhyOhWhy
Mon Jan 06, 2020 12:24 am
Forum: In-Laws Talk
Topic: I’m sensing a pattern here
Replies: 12
Views: 709

Re: I’m sensing a pattern here

Ahhh, the lovebombing! I'd consider going (unless you really don't like the people who are getting married). I only say that because I like to take the moral high ground. Most of the time, my in-laws don't actually want me involved in anything whatsoever, but I am included often only because it "loo...
by WhyOhWhy
Thu Dec 26, 2019 6:21 pm
Forum: In-Laws Talk
Topic: Oh The Games MIL plays...
Replies: 7
Views: 374

Re: Oh The Games MIL plays...

Your MIL sounds manipulative as hell. It's a shame your SIL plays the game, fussing and worrying about how to deal with your MIL's "gift"...but I guess now MIL has set the president that SIL no longer has to be so discerning about how the "gift" is dealt with. I'd say a pic of the girl holding the c...
by WhyOhWhy
Thu Dec 26, 2019 6:14 pm
Forum: In-Laws Talk
Topic: Falling In Line vs Not
Replies: 7
Views: 361

Re: Falling In Line vs Not

I think any aunts/uncles/siblings in our situation only choose to hear one side of story so they can justify the behaviors they might manage to cotton on to by the PILs. I mean, who wants to think their sister/parent is a manipulative and cruel person? As it turns out, the ones in question are very ...
by WhyOhWhy
Thu Dec 19, 2019 10:57 am
Forum: In-Laws Talk
Topic: Update: Eddie Munster
Replies: 5
Views: 355

Re: Update: Eddie Munster

Wow, sounds like he has some hopes for a brighter future. I hope he is also getting some therapy, as pushing down years of such violent thoughts and whatnot doesn't make them go away. He could still be a very dangerous individual, simply wearing better clothes and finding a way to "fit in". Wishing ...
by WhyOhWhy
Mon Dec 09, 2019 4:43 pm
Forum: In-Laws Talk
Topic: Fed Up
Replies: 2
Views: 189

Re: Fed Up

I think many of us have been there with our husbands. I'm so sorry. It's hard to get them to actually see the manipulation, toxicity, and unfairness of the situation. I got to a point where I said to my husband "You can do whatever you like with your mother, just realize that I choose NOT to. I find...
by WhyOhWhy
Sun Dec 08, 2019 8:03 pm
Forum: In-Laws Talk
Topic: Guilt Trip
Replies: 10
Views: 617

Re: Guilt Trip

My MIL once suggested that as women we are the caretakers and peacemakers of the family (yeah, the irony of that statement coming from her ) and that it was essentially my job to make nice even though I WAS making nice and it was another family member who was being a complete ass. That person didn't...
by WhyOhWhy
Fri Nov 29, 2019 2:06 pm
Forum: In-Laws Talk
Topic: Update on my Golden SIL
Replies: 7
Views: 479

Re: Update on my Golden SIL

I've never found an apology to help, whether I felt I did anything wrong that moment or not. I HAVE said "I'm sorry you were upset by that", and it mollified for a moment, but of course it did not stop the smear campaign. But, to be honest I couldn't care less about any of that. I did it because it ...
by WhyOhWhy
Fri Nov 29, 2019 1:36 pm
Forum: In-Laws Talk
Topic: Mother In Law's cruel behaviour
Replies: 4
Views: 390

Re: Mother In Law's cruel behaviour

Thank you. My wife and kids will see MIL on Boxing Day. I won't go with them. Even though I don't think all that much of my MIL I won't stand in the way of my wife and kids having a relationship with her. I don't think I really have the right to do that. But I don't have to. That's pretty much what...
by WhyOhWhy
Fri Nov 22, 2019 9:28 pm
Forum: In-Laws Talk
Topic: MIL in Hospital & The Dog
Replies: 8
Views: 377

Re: MIL in Hospital & The Dog

Good for you! She said "You will have to take care of the dog..." umm, NO. You don't HAVE to do anything. And, in fact, you have every right to say "No, I'm sorry, that won't work for us". Learning how to say NO to pushy people like that is a very important skill to cultivate! Glad the dog situation...
by WhyOhWhy
Wed Nov 20, 2019 10:09 pm
Forum: In-Laws Talk
Topic: Hoping DH doesn't fall for the lovebombing - AGAIN
Replies: 8
Views: 543

Re: Hoping DH doesn't fall for the lovebombing - AGAIN

So now I'm dredding this. I told DH this morning that if his "paaaaaaarents" pull the same crap they did last year - telling us to buy gifts for the kids from them and then having to be asked six times for reimbusement, the answer is no. I'm also expecting another, "Christmas is HERE" circus... Any...
by WhyOhWhy
Wed Nov 20, 2019 9:50 pm
Forum: In-Laws Talk
Topic: Hello
Replies: 3
Views: 249

Re: Hello

Welcome! It's very telling that you have such a wonderful attitude towards your DIL's and yet a less-wonderful connection with your IL's. It's almost as though you're a wonderful person and get along with the majority of people, which is telling in regards to the sort of people your IL's are. We'd l...