Search found 156 matches

by WhyOhWhy
Mon Dec 09, 2019 4:43 pm
Forum: In-Laws Talk
Topic: Fed Up
Replies: 2
Views: 80

Re: Fed Up

I think many of us have been there with our husbands. I'm so sorry. It's hard to get them to actually see the manipulation, toxicity, and unfairness of the situation. I got to a point where I said to my husband "You can do whatever you like with your mother, just realize that I choose NOT to. I find...
by WhyOhWhy
Sun Dec 08, 2019 8:03 pm
Forum: In-Laws Talk
Topic: Guilt Trip
Replies: 9
Views: 284

Re: Guilt Trip

My MIL once suggested that as women we are the caretakers and peacemakers of the family (yeah, the irony of that statement coming from her ) and that it was essentially my job to make nice even though I WAS making nice and it was another family member who was being a complete ass. That person didn't...
by WhyOhWhy
Fri Nov 29, 2019 2:06 pm
Forum: In-Laws Talk
Topic: Update on my Golden SIL
Replies: 7
Views: 249

Re: Update on my Golden SIL

I've never found an apology to help, whether I felt I did anything wrong that moment or not. I HAVE said "I'm sorry you were upset by that", and it mollified for a moment, but of course it did not stop the smear campaign. But, to be honest I couldn't care less about any of that. I did it because it ...
by WhyOhWhy
Fri Nov 29, 2019 1:36 pm
Forum: In-Laws Talk
Topic: Mother In Law's cruel behaviour
Replies: 4
Views: 221

Re: Mother In Law's cruel behaviour

Thank you. My wife and kids will see MIL on Boxing Day. I won't go with them. Even though I don't think all that much of my MIL I won't stand in the way of my wife and kids having a relationship with her. I don't think I really have the right to do that. But I don't have to. That's pretty much what...
by WhyOhWhy
Fri Nov 22, 2019 9:28 pm
Forum: In-Laws Talk
Topic: MIL in Hospital & The Dog
Replies: 8
Views: 205

Re: MIL in Hospital & The Dog

Good for you! She said "You will have to take care of the dog..." umm, NO. You don't HAVE to do anything. And, in fact, you have every right to say "No, I'm sorry, that won't work for us". Learning how to say NO to pushy people like that is a very important skill to cultivate! Glad the dog situation...
by WhyOhWhy
Wed Nov 20, 2019 10:09 pm
Forum: In-Laws Talk
Topic: Hoping DH doesn't fall for the lovebombing - AGAIN
Replies: 8
Views: 301

Re: Hoping DH doesn't fall for the lovebombing - AGAIN

So now I'm dredding this. I told DH this morning that if his "paaaaaaarents" pull the same crap they did last year - telling us to buy gifts for the kids from them and then having to be asked six times for reimbusement, the answer is no. I'm also expecting another, "Christmas is HERE" circus... Any...
by WhyOhWhy
Wed Nov 20, 2019 9:50 pm
Forum: In-Laws Talk
Topic: Hello
Replies: 3
Views: 123

Re: Hello

Welcome! It's very telling that you have such a wonderful attitude towards your DIL's and yet a less-wonderful connection with your IL's. It's almost as though you're a wonderful person and get along with the majority of people, which is telling in regards to the sort of people your IL's are. We'd l...
by WhyOhWhy
Wed Nov 13, 2019 10:18 am
Forum: In-Laws Talk
Topic: New here
Replies: 4
Views: 245

Re: New here

Welcome!! From the sounds of your story, you might want to consider pulling back on how often they are over your house as well as how often you share information about your children. If they ask probing questions about how you handled some issue or another with your kids, politely but firmly tell th...
by WhyOhWhy
Thu Nov 07, 2019 11:28 am
Forum: In-Laws Talk
Topic: Indian mother in law problems
Replies: 9
Views: 387

Re: Indian mother in law problems

I'm American and I could make a few suggestions about inviting YOUR girlfriends over for a luncheon or coffee (and making them aware of the situation) and making things a wee bit uncomfortable for your MIL in her home - oh, wait, I mean YOUR home! This is a great idea! I am a huge advocate of invit...
by WhyOhWhy
Tue Oct 29, 2019 6:58 pm
Forum: In-Laws Talk
Topic: Mother In Laws can be blocked from texting too!!!
Replies: 2
Views: 278

Re: Mother In Laws can be blocked from texting too!!!

I would have two words for my husband if he said that to me, and they aren't "bless you".
My husband knows he would get a tongue lashing if he even thought to not only accuse me of such a thing, but to also use such language towards me. I absolutely wouldn't tolerate that.
by WhyOhWhy
Mon Oct 21, 2019 5:39 pm
Forum: In-Laws Talk
Topic: It appears FIL is thirsty for some drama
Replies: 5
Views: 247

Re: It appears FIL is thirsty for some drama

Good to see you, MomJeans! The poor thing is clearly the unwitting messenger of your FIL's childish attempt to irritate and insult you. Next time, when you hand her the bulbs say "...and before you ask, these are FREE for you and a gesture of my thanks for all you do for me. See you next time!" with...
by WhyOhWhy
Mon Oct 21, 2019 1:21 pm
Forum: In-Laws Talk
Topic: Time To Chat About Holiday Plans
Replies: 20
Views: 992

Re: Time To Chat About Holiday Plans

:? I don't really know how our holidays will go this year. I am stressed just thinking about it...Husband wants to go out and about he says holidays are meant to be shared with family.. I just assumed when we got married that me and the kids were his family. maybe i am just a humbug this year? No, ...
by WhyOhWhy
Fri Oct 18, 2019 2:21 pm
Forum: In-Laws Talk
Topic: DH has learned who his mother is
Replies: 5
Views: 390

Re: DH has learned who his mother is

It's so validating to have these men finally admit to themselves (and to us) that their families are toxic. It sucks that you can't stop the unwanted calls via blocking, I guess maybe a phone number change is in order.
by WhyOhWhy
Fri Oct 18, 2019 2:14 pm
Forum: In-Laws Talk
Topic: I feel lost, I don't know what my next move should be...
Replies: 5
Views: 427

Re: I feel lost, I don't know what my next move should be...

You had good intentions, showing "love" and support on a post that you did not fully understand the hidden meanings behind. For someone to get upset with you for that, clearly they already had that bullet in the chamber, Hun. Your FIL already wanted an excuse to shut you out and finally found someth...
by WhyOhWhy
Fri Oct 18, 2019 2:01 pm
Forum: In-Laws Talk
Topic: Time To Chat About Holiday Plans
Replies: 20
Views: 992

Re: Time To Chat About Holiday Plans

I'll never forget that one Thanksgiving when I had spent a few hours at MIL's house then told her we were leaving to my GM's place because she recently had open heart surgery. MIL's response was "Why did you have to have a family?". I don't care what we do. I'm just happy we no longer have the ILs ...