Search found 168 matches

by WhyOhWhy
Mon Feb 17, 2020 10:31 pm
Forum: In-Laws Talk
Topic: Its 2020 and the new(ish) stoopid games have begun!
Replies: 6
Views: 248

Re: Its 2020 and the new(ish) stoopid games have begun!

I intercept literally everything addressed to this house and open it to ensure that not only is everyone included, but also that the item itself is appropriate (clothing sent 2 sizes too small go directly into the donation bag, do not pass go). I don't allow anyone to play those games via the mail, ...
by WhyOhWhy
Wed Feb 05, 2020 1:46 pm
Forum: In-Laws Talk
Topic: MIL's ashes, a questionable diagnosis, and FIL's move
Replies: 5
Views: 268

Re: MIL's ashes, a questionable diagnosis, and FIL's move

Sounds like your FIL just wants to move on with his life. It's possible the new step-mother doesn't want reminders of his late wife around and pushed him to get rid of the ashes. It's also possible the step-mother is pushing him away from SIL (since she's another reminder of the late wife). It's ALS...
by WhyOhWhy
Wed Feb 05, 2020 12:13 pm
Forum: In-Laws Talk
Topic: In a strange situation...
Replies: 6
Views: 322

Re: In a strange situation...

Those who know me on here know exactly what I'm about to say, so to echo another suggestion above, here I go...this cannot be said often enough: Move further away if you can. The measure of peace you get when you are too far away for toxic people to disrupt your everyday life is truly priceless. It ...
by WhyOhWhy
Wed Feb 05, 2020 12:05 pm
Forum: In-Laws Talk
Topic: Happy New Year (Feb.3) Remember me? Thank you!
Replies: 7
Views: 330

Re: Happy New Year (Feb.3) Remember me? Thank you!

Of course we remember you JPHH :D So glad to hear you are still living your best life! My in-laws will never change, that much has been made abundantly clear, but at least we aren't nearby to have to deal with it often. After decades of dealing with such an interesting bunch of folks, I now find mys...
by WhyOhWhy
Tue Jan 21, 2020 9:02 pm
Forum: In-Laws Talk
Topic: Happy New Year
Replies: 4
Views: 255

Re: Happy New Year

It's always so uncomfortable in the moment to refuse things like pics with toxic family members. I mean, y'all did agree to stop in when he thought your FIL was standing there, and of course the subject of seeing the kids more was bound to come up. I guess from now on avoid going by there, and next ...
by WhyOhWhy
Sat Jan 18, 2020 3:12 pm
Forum: In-Laws Talk
Topic: Finally free
Replies: 5
Views: 327

Re: Finally free

There's a lot to unpack from reading this, which means of course it's SO much more to unpack for you who has lived it. There's a lot I want to say, but the thing that hit me first was that (I'm sure you must know this by now) it is probably a huge blessing that you did not have a child with your spo...
by WhyOhWhy
Mon Jan 13, 2020 4:43 pm
Forum: In-Laws Talk
Topic: Happy 2020! Trying to start my New Year right...advice?
Replies: 4
Views: 273

Re: Happy 2020! Trying to start my New Year right...advice?

I created a special list called NOPE and put anyone I didn't want to see such personal posts and pics on (if you click on "friends" under their name, there's an option to "add to another list". They stay your FB friend, but whenever you create a post that you don't want those particular people to se...
by WhyOhWhy
Mon Jan 06, 2020 12:29 am
Forum: In-Laws Talk
Topic: Another generation is born into the toxic ILs
Replies: 7
Views: 562

Re: Another generation is born into the toxic ILs

Steer clear of the $#!t show and hope for the best. That poor baby will likely be traumatized by that mess of a family! Poor little thing!
by WhyOhWhy
Mon Jan 06, 2020 12:24 am
Forum: In-Laws Talk
Topic: I’m sensing a pattern here
Replies: 12
Views: 921

Re: I’m sensing a pattern here

Ahhh, the lovebombing! I'd consider going (unless you really don't like the people who are getting married). I only say that because I like to take the moral high ground. Most of the time, my in-laws don't actually want me involved in anything whatsoever, but I am included often only because it "loo...
by WhyOhWhy
Thu Dec 26, 2019 6:21 pm
Forum: In-Laws Talk
Topic: Oh The Games MIL plays...
Replies: 8
Views: 556

Re: Oh The Games MIL plays...

Your MIL sounds manipulative as hell. It's a shame your SIL plays the game, fussing and worrying about how to deal with your MIL's "gift"...but I guess now MIL has set the president that SIL no longer has to be so discerning about how the "gift" is dealt with. I'd say a pic of the girl holding the c...
by WhyOhWhy
Thu Dec 26, 2019 6:14 pm
Forum: In-Laws Talk
Topic: Falling In Line vs Not
Replies: 7
Views: 505

Re: Falling In Line vs Not

I think any aunts/uncles/siblings in our situation only choose to hear one side of story so they can justify the behaviors they might manage to cotton on to by the PILs. I mean, who wants to think their sister/parent is a manipulative and cruel person? As it turns out, the ones in question are very ...
by WhyOhWhy
Thu Dec 19, 2019 10:57 am
Forum: In-Laws Talk
Topic: Update: Eddie Munster
Replies: 5
Views: 480

Re: Update: Eddie Munster

Wow, sounds like he has some hopes for a brighter future. I hope he is also getting some therapy, as pushing down years of such violent thoughts and whatnot doesn't make them go away. He could still be a very dangerous individual, simply wearing better clothes and finding a way to "fit in". Wishing ...
by WhyOhWhy
Mon Dec 09, 2019 4:43 pm
Forum: In-Laws Talk
Topic: Fed Up
Replies: 2
Views: 265

Re: Fed Up

I think many of us have been there with our husbands. I'm so sorry. It's hard to get them to actually see the manipulation, toxicity, and unfairness of the situation. I got to a point where I said to my husband "You can do whatever you like with your mother, just realize that I choose NOT to. I find...
by WhyOhWhy
Sun Dec 08, 2019 8:03 pm
Forum: In-Laws Talk
Topic: Guilt Trip
Replies: 10
Views: 811

Re: Guilt Trip

My MIL once suggested that as women we are the caretakers and peacemakers of the family (yeah, the irony of that statement coming from her ) and that it was essentially my job to make nice even though I WAS making nice and it was another family member who was being a complete ass. That person didn't...
by WhyOhWhy
Fri Nov 29, 2019 2:06 pm
Forum: In-Laws Talk
Topic: Update on my Golden SIL
Replies: 7
Views: 651

Re: Update on my Golden SIL

I've never found an apology to help, whether I felt I did anything wrong that moment or not. I HAVE said "I'm sorry you were upset by that", and it mollified for a moment, but of course it did not stop the smear campaign. But, to be honest I couldn't care less about any of that. I did it because it ...