DH finally sees the light with his family

Talk about anything and everything in-law related.

Moderators: Phred, willthetruthbetold, meimei

DH finally sees the light with his family

Postby yogiguru » Fri Jun 15, 2018 1:12 am

Dealing with my in-laws has been mentally and physically exhausting. I'm sure many of you know how I feel. I've been lurking on this site for while, not posting as I wanted to put these losers out of my head.

We had to come back up north to see my MIL and to pick up my car that I had left behind 9 months ago. I finally sold it today. My car was worn out from all the driving and carting stuff around. My MIL never would ride in my car as it was too "old" and not pretty.

For the 7 years we've been married, 5 of our summers have been taking care of mommy dearest so the golden BIL can have the summer off. Come to find out golden boy never came by unless it was to cut the grass in the front yard and leave. So we weren't giving him the summer off, we were just burning through money to appease the queen bee who wanted to be catered to and courted.

We drove up a week ago, 3 hard days of driving to get here. My back hurt so bad from sitting in the car, not to mention my ankles felt like sausages. (The salty food on the road and lack of water didn't help).

We arrive and get settled. The next night we ate out at a local bar/restaurant as we didn't have any food in the refrigerator and was just too tired to cook. I got a severe case of food poisoning. I literally thought I would have to go to the ER my gut hurt so bad. So for the next two days I crawled around the house like a baby eating toast and tea to heal up. My DH was pretty sick, but not as bad.

While we were crawling around I kept calling my MIL and the phone just kept ringing. Texted the BIL and SIL, no answer. Finally Monday, we came to the house and the back lock was changed. Mind you this is my husband's house where he was born and he has a key. We looked in the windows and the furniture was gone. Talked to my neighbor and she said people were in and out of here all weekend moving furniture. I thought ruh roh, they've put MIL in an assisted living center.

We drove to the center and there was MIL in her new digs. She's not liking it at all. Tough titty MIL, we told you we were coming to hire you a live in caregiver, the Amazon Echo to monitor you with cameras and a smart TV to watch online TV. But OH NO, I'm going to listen to my oldest son (the golden child) and let him put me in an assisted living center and pay 3X's the monthly fee!

The straw that broke the camel's back was today. Apparently BIL now has POA over her medical and financial. I'm not sure how he did that legally as something like this needs to be addressed in a hearing. More lawyers and more burning through money.

My poor DH is really upset about this. He told me today, I have no family. I was so upset about his statement I wanted to throttle his entire crew. My gut started hurting again. The stress of his family and their asshattery I believe is partly responsible for my ulcer.

I was finally able to talk to a nurse that worked at this facility mommy dearest is living in. The golden boy dropped her off in her new digs, moved the furniture in a hurry, 4 or 5 pizzas were purchased (MIL paid for it of course) to satiate themselves after this tough move. Believe me, this is more exercise than these tubs have had in years. Boy can they move fast when they want to. She said there has been zero visits to her at all from anyone except my DH and I.

My MIL STILL thinks golden boy is going to come visit her often. Not going to happen, me thinks. She's out of his hair, he can now come and go as he pleases and once the money runs out, off to government assistance nursing home she goes.

WHY do women (not trying to be sexist here ladies) continue to make excuses, defend and justify people like golden boy's behavior, while my DH and I who spend a boat load of money coming to see her and staying the entire summer is treated like the ugly stepchild? She pines over people who wouldn't pee on her if she were on fire, yet people like my DH and I are completely ignored.

My husband still has a few male friends who think the world of him. He's a good guy. I'm a good person. Family is not always the people who raised you, but can be someone you meet and befriend later in life.

I'm seriously thinking of starting a club on Craig's List for those who have no family and are alone or adult orphans.
yogiguru
Angry
 
Posts: 36
Joined: Mon Jul 30, 2012 10:55 am
Location: Alabama

Re: DH finally sees the light with his family

Postby jigglypuff » Fri Jun 15, 2018 2:33 am

My poor DH is really upset about this. He told me today, I have no family.

WHY do women (not trying to be sexist here ladies) continue to make excuses, defend and justify people like golden boy's behavior, while my DH and I who spend a boat load of money coming to see her and staying the entire summer is treated like the ugly stepchild? She pines over people who wouldn't pee on her if she were on fire, yet people like my DH and I are completely ignored.


Sadly, I know how your DH feels. I'm sorry they've put you both through that.

My mother is just like your MIL. She worships people who treat her like dirt and never appreciates the help her kids give her. Which is why I stopped bothering helping her with anything. She needs help? She can call one of her abusive sisters.

I'll tell you one thing though, people like your MIL never end up in a good place. The toxic people they surround themselves never treat them well and they end up paying for it. Just like your MIL is doing now. She made her bed.

An online group isn't a bad idea.
'As the days go by, I think of how lucky I am... That you're not here to ruin it for me'
jigglypuff
Nuclear
 
Posts: 2189
Joined: Mon Nov 21, 2011 6:32 am

Re: DH finally sees the light with his family

Postby yogiguru » Fri Jun 15, 2018 9:21 pm

Thank you for your response.

It's almost like when I was single, men and women would pine over those who wouldn't give them the time of day, but nice men/women were overlooked and ignored.

We're leaving in a few days. It's just way too much bad energy for the both of us. My husband is physically and mentally exhausted.

I told him when we get home, we're putting up our pool with the cover overhead and we're dipping in the pool nightly to beat the heat. Maybe have some fun as a couple and have cocktails in the moonlight.
yogiguru
Angry
 
Posts: 36
Joined: Mon Jul 30, 2012 10:55 am
Location: Alabama


Return to In-Laws Talk

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 4 guests