Attention Seeking Theatrics

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Attention Seeking Theatrics

Postby Melody » Wed May 15, 2019 7:22 am

In honor of Mother's Day, I'm starting a new thread of silly behavior. Stepmonster started a token 529 for two of our four kids (she inherited a LOT of money from her father - who was always very generous to us and she even admitted that he wanted to leave the gc and ggcs something!). 16 years ago she made a HUGE F'N display that if DH and I were STIIIIIIIIIILLLLLLLL together, they'd do this for ALLLLLLLLLL the kids. (Making it sound like they would pay for ALL of the kids' college).

Well Eldest DD is graduating - albeit a year early. Shocker! Spoiler Alert! NOT A PENNY. Not even a stupid card or throw rug!

Meanwhile, stepmonster set up 529s (which I normally highly recommend) for the two younger kids. But she knows everything. (BTW I have a professional finance background). Well she F'd up the setup and F'd up the distribution (and she chose the one that I would call a babysitter service and STILL ignored the babysitter!) and immediately lost 40%!!!

DH finally put a stop to it, but she would take the statement, put it in a different flashy envelope and mail the thing to us every three months without fail. (Meanwhile, she has no idea - but we set up small funds for the nieces and nephews that get mailed directly to their parents). Its like she wanted to be thanked every three months for a gift she hasn't even given yet!

Ughhhh!!!
Melody
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Re: Attention Seeking Theatrics

Postby KeeperOfPrecious » Wed May 15, 2019 10:04 am

Melody~

Wow, unreal. So she’s fluffing up gifts in pretty envelopes to look all fancy for the extra kudos, when theres no gift yet? The whole, “look at me, I’m so thoughtfull” deal lol.

My MIL sobbed all day on Mother’s Day to my DH. “It isn’t fair” type drama. So now where is she today? She decided to take another trip to see her ex SIL, my DH’s A. This A is the FM extraordinaire. This should be very interesting to see what comes out of that visit, it’s never good for the rest of the family when those two are paired up. Wonder if I’ll be the target again lol. Whatever, I love when they get together, they seem to keep building my case against them. Pass the popcorn haha.

Our N comes to visit us in a couple weeks too. I’m pretty sure MIL is needing attention time from her FM bestie since she’s been “snubbed” by the GD. MIL still doesn’t get it, she can still invite her GD to visit after she’s with us. But nope, the “damage” is done, she’d rather sulk than make plans for her GD to come out and see her. When there’s a solution, she does t want it, she’s all about the martyr, poor me attention.

I can tell you one thing for certain, our FIL is LOVING the break from the old shrew. That poor guy.

The devil himself is impressed with her handiwork.
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Re: Attention Seeking Theatrics

Postby livingmylifeforme » Wed May 15, 2019 6:52 pm

Melody: Wow, seriously? I agree with KeeperOfPrecious, she's definitely trying to say "Wow, look at me I'm such a wonderful mother, MIL, and grandmother!" I hope she never hears about them.

KeeperOfPrecious: Oh, goodness! Wait, the FM is an ex? Wow, what does that say about her own family? Oh of course she's just whining about it instead of actually solving her problem. It makes her look like the victim, which is for sure what she's going for. Her own family doesn't want to play her games, and she seems like she just expects everybody to kowtow to her. Can't wait to hear the result of her visit to her FM.
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Re: Attention Seeking Theatrics

Postby Melody » Thu May 16, 2019 8:32 am

@Livingmylifeforme - I was actually a little confused myself. So many abbreviations for idiots! That is weird!

@Keeper - once again a parallel! I think we might be SILs! Stepmonster is always taking trips to Europe (and one to Peru because she couldn't get high enough here). FIL takes golf trips. We can NEVER get a straight answer as to dates - but they seems to be no overlap, lol. I would feel bad about FIL being "stuck" but he chose to enable this sh*t-show! We always try to see him when Stepmonster is jet-setting or DH has vacation and he's always "busy".

Regarding the 529s, I might be unreasonable. Stepmonster inherited the money and since GF didn't spell it out exactly, she's entitled to do whatever she wants. But GF was always kind about the GC and made a fuss how "Kids ARE Kids" - they shouldn't have to care who is a half-sib and who is a step. He treated them all the same. Meanwhile Stepb*tch goes out of her way to favor them (And take up residence at L&T).

And these token 529s? (Not so token to someone who works hard, but one shopping trip for her). I don't wan't to sound ungrateful, but I know what's going to happen.)

I've already warned DH, I don't want her payouts (if there ever is any and too late for the older kids she made a fuss over) when the time comes. WAY TOO many strings! She'll either withdraw money to decorate THEIR dorm rooms the way SHE wants, and try to push the unqualified withdrawal/tax penalty off on us, OR she'll try to make them take some course that ISN'T in their major (making them overload or graduate late).
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Re: Attention Seeking Theatrics

Postby KeeperOfPrecious » Thu May 16, 2019 10:34 am

LMLFM~

Yes, the A is my MIL’s exSIL. My MIL has HUGE abandonment issues. MIL made sure that when she divorced my FIL over 40 years ago, she would not be outcast from the family. The A, and my FIL (her brother) have never gotten along. So in all these years, these two (MIL&FMA) have used each other for their own agenda. The A loves to play games, she loves keeping the exW around for her own fun to torment her B. How annoying to get a divorce and your own sibling keeps your ex around to help make family gatherings that much more uncomfortable. In fact, the FMA helped orchestrate the divorce. When my FIL remarried, my MIL couldn’t get over the fact that he moved on. So she takes the two kids they had together (my DH&BIL) and dumps them on to her ex and his new wife to raise. Also at the urging of the A.

What a waste of life. Living your life under someone else’s horrible advisement. Clearly the A is a Malignant Narcissist

My weak minded MIL thinks she owes her life to this A for taking her under her wing. The A loves the fact that she has a weak minded exSIL to puppet the rest of her life. It’s so pathetic. The A is the main puppet master of the family. Her own D has never married or had children because she is also under her control. So these two spending time together is never good lol. I can’t imagine what they talk about

Melody ~

Here’s another nugget of “attention seeking theatrics”.

I learned that my MIL has been posting all over social media, cable news celebrity anchor sites, her concern for her son. OMG, lol. She is taking the latest crisis and making it all about her and he concerns for her son. She says that she is so distraught and terrified that she can only watch the news in “baby steps” hahahaha.. omg and she cannot watch news without being panicked lol, What Mother says that? I can tell you that all her concerns over the years have all been about her and her need for the attention. She fakes her “worried” mom crap too much, so much that it’s clealry an attention ploy. The funny thing that makes me all warm inside is the fact not one single person reacted to her stupid comment hahahaha.. too bad lady, no one cares

For instance, when our youngest (19 year old) was flying to another state, she messaged 50 times making sure we contact her when he lands, she’s so worried you see. She couldn’t even contain herself his entire flight. Seriously, a simple flight becomes all about her. God, she makes me crazy. I wish the men in our family would STOP giving her itineraries and other life info that deosnt concern her. They’re creating this horrible monster.

The devil himself is impressed with her handiwork.
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Re: Attention Seeking Theatrics

Postby livingmylifeforme » Thu May 16, 2019 10:50 am

Melody: I get what you're saying about the 529s. I didn't think that you expected her to even do anything for you or your children. She is trying to bait you with a large sum of money it seems like to me. She's the one bringing it up it seems like. If you went to her talking about the money and how you wanted some of it for you or your children, then yes that would be unreasonable. However, she's the one who's all "Look what I have here!" I don't blame you for not wanting any part of it, because it's just another way for her to have control.

KeeperOfPrecious: Okay, that clears it up. Oh geez! That sounds like a complete nightmare. Well, you know that they say "Birds of a feather flock together." No wonder why they get along so well. Oh wow, your MIL going and whining on social media and random sites about how "worried" she is. Give us a break, lady! t reminds me of stories I've seen online about MILs complaining about DILs. I've only seen ONE story where I'm actually on the MIL's side, and thankfully her son is no longer with her. The rest were all "I don't *know* what happened, blah blah blah (cue tiny violin)." There was one who said that she made a passing comment while her DIL (or maybe just son't GF I can't remember) was cooking for them both and making Thai food. The mother said "My son't doesn't like Thai food," and she responded with "He does now," :lol: I wonder what other rude comments she made/things she's done to lead to being cut off.
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Re: Attention Seeking Theatrics

Postby Melody » Fri May 17, 2019 8:15 am

@Keeper - I'd be really annoyed at those texts. I get nervous when my kids fly, but WTF does she need to be "informed". She's not picking them up from the airport, is she? And that might be my answer. "I was ON the way to the airport, but had to pull over on the side of the highway because my phone kept blowing up". (let her figure out the lack of tech savvy there - but either way stop ANNOYING ME!).

Yes, DH needs to stop giving her itineraries.

@Livingmylifeforme - the comment about liking Thai now is great. I'm a decent cook. Stepmonster kept trying to force her "cooking" on me when I was pregnant with gestational diabetes. I know that's tough to cook for but sugar can cause a miscarriage (and she kept dumping sugar into everything or serving jarred applesauce - first ingredient high fructose corn syrup and they LYING about ingredients) and the "options" she gave made me barf whatever I had already eaten, lol. , and am sometimes tempted to say "THAT'S BECAUSE YOUR COOKING SUCKS!" LOL!
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Re: Attention Seeking Theatrics

Postby KeeperOfPrecious » Sat May 18, 2019 8:28 am

LMLFM ~

Those DIL sites crack me up. All the MIL’s trying to plead fruitless cases haha. They accuse the DIL’s of “keeping their sons from them”, and “DIL is so controlling” :lol: ... I just checked out the FB DIL page, it’s not as lively and active as those of us trying to rid ourselves of the miserable old shrewish MIL’s :lol:

What part of “cut the cord and leave and cleave are they having trouble accepting?” All of it? lol I think it starts the first time their son is actually busy, doing Hubby life stuff, they instantly attack the DIL, it has to be her fault. If he didn’t go and get married, I would have my son all to myself for the rest of my life.
I hate having to pry my MIL’s hands off my DH. My God lady, let him go.

The devil himself is impressed with her handiwork.
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Re: Attention Seeking Theatrics

Postby KeeperOfPrecious » Sun May 19, 2019 12:13 pm

Update:

Just found out MIL did not go meet the FMA. MIL claims to be “sick”. Funny, because she was “sick” a few weeks ago. I’m sure it has to do with the FMA’s Bf living there. My MIL does not like sharing space with others. I think there might be bad blood. So nothing brewing between those cauldron stirrers hahaha.

I waited long enough to ask. I didn’t want to bring it up, but since DH just got into an argument with his mother, I was able to just “casually” mention and ask how her visit is going lol.

I think we are one day closer to my DH going NC. He won’t ever go full throttle with CO. NC is sufficient until she jacks that up too.

The devil himself is impressed with her handiwork.
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Re: Attention Seeking Theatrics

Postby Melody » Mon May 20, 2019 8:28 am

:lol: Cauldron stirrers!

Yep, "sick". I've gotten "You'll NEVER believe what happened!" Finally, something that ISN'T a lie!

No, I'm afraid that you DH will never go C/O but wow this is promising! I know it feels like an eternity, but it is actually moving pretty quickly! Wow, what your DH can accomplish with all the freed up mommy blab time!
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Re: Attention Seeking Theatrics

Postby KeeperOfPrecious » Mon May 20, 2019 11:48 am

Melody~

Oh there’s more lol. The argument he got into with his mother was all about my DH’s scheduling conflict.

We have so much going on. Between my DH’s job, the home repairs, the DN coming, the golf trip DH’s taking and the arrival of our DS, my DH accidentally told our DS to come at a time when DH was leaving town. Total ooopsie. When I found out about the dates our DS was coming, I reminded DH that this is when he’s involved in a golf tourney. Blah blah blah

So my DH, for some ungodly reason, felt his NM should know these small, personal, “insignificant to her”, details.

DH messages me that he’s about to lose it with his NM. He sends me a screen shot of his convo with his NM. His NM came completely unhinged over the fact that my DH was going to be out of town a couple days after our DS gets here. So FRIGGEN what!!! Omg lol wow

MIL goes on to tell my DH that he lied to his DS and that he’s being deceitful and she’s absolutely “bothered” by that. Unreal. She managed to take a simple schedule conflict and turn it around to be some plot to lie to our DS, because we are so full of lies and deceit :lol:

I’m happy this happened. MIL came unglued with her precious, golden boy during a simple conversation. It’s to the point now where anything he brings up, MIL is able to twist it out of shape in order for something to argue about.

MIL brought up the fact that her DS didn’t send a Mother’s Day card. BIL did and MIL mentions that my SIL didn’t sign it. This MD card convo came up during her rant. She’s piling on. She’s not upset about the scheduling conflict, she’s actually unloading everything she’s been so pissed off about and didn’t talk about. Of course with our DN coming to see us and not her is another pile. Then the fact MIL faked illness to not go visit her FM is another thing that she’s all huffy over. The woman cannot be happy, not ever.

The devil himself is impressed with her handiwork.
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Re: Attention Seeking Theatrics

Postby WhyOhWhy » Tue May 21, 2019 3:59 pm

I suppose I should be grateful the in-laws have very little to do with us? (they think it's a punishment...lololololol!) I DON'T miss the days of living closer and being emotionally abused regularly and needing to protect my children from their mind games and attitudes. These days, we seem to be at a sort of cease fire for the moment and things are running rather smoothly (again, thanks to much less contact so fewer opportunities for my MIL to be passive aggressive or my FIL to throw some attitude because I dared to speak). Hubs and the kids and I are all well aware of the games, and we're at a point where we just keep on living our lives, being happy with the people around us, and limiting opportunities for the IL's to find a way to hurt someone's feelings. For now, it's going OK.
I will not let them drag me down to their level again
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Re: Attention Seeking Theatrics

Postby livingmylifeforme » Tue May 21, 2019 7:54 pm

Melody: Haha, isn't it great? Yeah, I guess I'm an okay cook myself. DH is much better at it.

KeeperOfPrecious: Hahahaha, I know!! All the "Poor me!" stuff is great! I just want to say "Okay, but what's the *real* story here?" Oh, wow so much drama with your MIL. Yeah, it seems like she can never be happy. At least she did a Mother's Day card. She's just looking for more stuff to argue about, because I guess her life is that boring. Keep us updated.

WhyOhWhy: Yes, staying away from them seems to be doing you good. Having a nice and relaxing time without them.
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Re: Attention Seeking Theatrics

Postby Melody » Wed May 22, 2019 9:03 am

@Keeper - You might want to write some of this down (although you have a blog here, lol). If DH goes LC, which I sure hope he does, you wouldn't want him to "forget" the antics in six months - and "giver her another change" or whatever such nonsense. Although "reminding" him vs. annoying him can be such a tricky balance.

@Livingmylifeforme - mixed blessing on the cooking. While I believe they enjoy it and are eating healthier, my family expects it now (even though I'm trying to get other work done). They critique my dishes like a cooking show (even though my DH's version of "cooking" is heating up tater tots and chicken fingers and he's the hero when he orders out). And my DH accuses me of "making him fat" to keep him faithful, lol. Meanwhile, I never told him to get a third serving.
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Re: Attention Seeking Theatrics

Postby livingmylifeforme » Wed May 22, 2019 4:30 pm

Melody: Wow! She's the definition of the kind of mother who thinks their children poop ice cream. If my DIL or even SIL took the time to cook a meal, I would thank them and eat their food criticism free. Even if I didn't like it. Then, I would maybe tell them to relax while I help clean up. Ermm, no. He's just gaining weight because he's eating more. He just likes your cooking that much :wink: Maybe try that line next time she accuses you :D
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